Scar Tissue That I Wish You Saw

Some tunes while you read.  The video and song are completely irrelevant to the entry except for the matching titles, and maybe some symbolic reference to scar tissue.  If you try really hard to make it fit.  It's just a pretty song.  I love how the guy is cracking his fingers in the beginning:



You can read the story leading up to the goodies, or jump straight down for candy shopping.

I was a runner and a strength training fiend.  I started running about 2 years ago; strength training since I was 19.  For measuring purposes, I'm 27 now. During the year I discovered the magical sport of running, the collagen on the soles of my feet deteriorated extremely fast for someone who was just getting started.  At this point, I was still a pretty physically healthy person but with unusual symptoms escalating.  That's part of the reason I don't wear heels now. It's likable to bones hitting the floor without cushion, which causes inflammation to the surrounding muscle and tissues.  It was easy to assume I was simply over doing it because I wanted to be oh-so-skinny while eating everything in my path. My and shoulders were not healing correctly after shoulder presses and anything that involved the neck.  I would get abnormally stiff.  I was convinced I had simply slipped into habits of bad form. Then I was convinced I wasn't stretching enough, which was true, for all those fanatics who think you don't need to stretch. You've been warned.

Extra elapsed days were appearing in between workout sessions to let my body heal.   By the time I prematurely hung up on my beloved running, I was spending most of my time in the gym stretching for relief, abandoning the weight room.  No matter how much effort I put into re-aligning my spinal posture, I still have awkward spots that remain in active/or inactive muscles on my upper back, spreading gradually to the lumbar area.  What was happening is that I was creating a lot of scar tissue.  Only recently, have all these trouble spots advanced into considerable inflammation.  Although unsure of what exactly happens to my muscle and tendons, it is very similar to these descriptions.  I also had a chiropractor in North Carolina tell my my "special neck" was surrounded by this thick band of scar tissue, so as went through all these mysterious changes I knew what it felt like, and felt it was spreading.

The skin on the bottom of my feet became rough. My hands seem to be a tad bit tougher than before. Nothing too severe, and again, it was easy to assume I was just aging normally or that too many years in the gym were taking a toll.  I'm taking all action to circumvent avoidable progression of the symptoms.  When we're healthy, we tend to forget that time and money spent on aesthetic maintenance is to keep our bodies in good functioning condition, not just an external beauty factor.  We put lotion on our hands because we like them soft, but what you're doing is replenishing cells.  We scrub our tootsies because they look good in sandals, but we're sloughing away dead cells and making way for new ones.  Everything we do to look good is coming deep down from a cellular level.

It was very strange to me when I had to start exerting extra time and effort to keep my skin conditioned and healthy.  My hair had always been abundant and my skin well moisturized, if not oily.  But now, my healing rate was perceivably slowing down.  Since childhood, I'd had certain sensitivities, but mom and I never put it together.  So eventually, certain eyeshadows starting causing allergic reactions on the eyelids, my hair no longer accepted moisture from ordinary shampoos or even cholesterol treatments.  Gradually, every beauty product I used was becoming obsolete to my aid.  Another factor I didn't bother to consider was the foods I was eating because no doctor would even hint at a food intolerance.  I didn't know better at the time. Had we known, I wouldn't have had a recurring tiny fungal-like phenomenon of a rash on the little web between my fourth and pinky finger. The redness and itchiness of this mystifying spot had become a seasonal allergy indicator.

Following my gut that something was just not right, despite many friends and even family insisting I was worrying needlessly,  I started educating myself on beauty products, which led to illumination about food allergies, chemicals, preservatives, and color dyes.  My blood had built up toxins from the top of my head to the tip of my toes.  It was rejecting anything non-organic.  So I started switching to nature friendly creams and cleansing agents.

Since I don't have average health, I have to be strictly mindful of products.  I can't buy them for economic convenience or some smell-good gimmick.  It took trial and error, and lot of trips to Health Food stores, funky scents, and crumbly textures.  You may not have to know what hyaluronic acid is, but you probably should if you want to extend your longevity.  One should  toss around the idea of chucking some of the things (not all) in your toiletry cabinet and play with a new favorite. I'm not professional advertiser (yet), but I have collected useful info over time that is very useful to share with ladies who love their skin. These products have rocked my world! They're better than the products loaded with scientific un-pronounceable names.

Jump below

Yummy-licious Organic Products

You can click on the picture to link you up in a new window. They're available by various retailers, but I'm sharing the most economic places you can find them.

[caption id="" align="alignnone" width="150" caption="Tisserand Tea Tree and Grapefruit Skin Wash"][/caption]

I accidentally bought this as a face wash, thinking it was $8. I almost returned it when I realized I paid $16, but in one day I realized it cleans up better than Proactive.  Gets rid of blackheads and makes skin glow.  I lost the pallid ghost look and became Latin again overnight.  It also doubles as a shower gel and excels at the job too.

[caption id="" align="alignnone" width="150" caption="Earth Therapeutics      Cracked Heel Repair"][/caption]

Running really damaged my feet.  They don't heal well and need a lot of maintenance.  This stick smells so good I could eat my feet.  The results are immediate.  This product is simple and effective.

[caption id="" align="alignnone" width="200" caption="Himalayan Toothpaste"][/caption]

This Indian-made toothpaste will brush junk off your teeth like Arm &Hammer and Colgate could never dream of.  Gluten-free, flouride-free.  I originally paid $6 at Vitamin Shoppe until my Natural Health doctor told me about www.vitacost.com.  Of all items, this one impressed me the most.  Toothpaste is not a product we come to expect too much from. I could never go back to any other toothpaste and my pearly whites can skip a visit to the dentist this year. Oh yea, it helps in the whitening department.

[caption id="" align="alignnone" width="83" caption="Kiss My Face Shampoo"][/caption]

Shampoo is the most cautious risk I take.  I love my hair.  I switched from Loreal's new sulfate-free life to this one from how finicky my scalp had become toward any foreign substances .  If your lovely locks hate you because of you've killed them with chemicals, this will give your broken ends a break.  Even if you only use it for a few days at a time.  Honestly, I love and prefer the feel gooey and slimy-soap feel of questionable substances in regular bottles, but I made this switch for the greater good.   I also air dry periodically for a few days.  It's torture, I say, but not hopeless.

*Head's up: this will not create suds or feel very slippery. It takes some getting used to but it will scrub your head good and clean, and leave your mane shiny and happy.

[caption id="" align="alignnone" width="77" caption="Alba Very Emollient Body Lotion - Original"][/caption]

This is the most recent jewel I found (this weekend!) and I kick myself for procrastinating on an easy online order because I wanted to "shop around" (I'm doing air quotes with my stubby fingers).  Last minute, I found myself in dire need of lotion and I paid $16.99 at Target for this bottle.  If you click on this picture's link, Vitacost only charges $7.94! Kick, kick, kick. It's available fragrance free and if you're wondering what emollient means, click here.

It wasn't amazing; it was miraculous.  I don't exaggerate when I say I was desperate to find a good non-greasy but replenishing potion that didn't leave me itchy or even drier than how I started.  I also needed something that wouldn't break the bank, but I ended up dishing it out last minute anyway.  Lately, my skin doesn't just get ashy, it cracks and bleeds. Honestly, I proclaim: I shall never love another.  Even my husband loved it -and a little mushy nonsense I have to throw in there- I still get warm fuzzies when Husband borrows my stuff or vice versa (blush).  Had I played a little riskier, even with shipping and handling, I would've still paid less than I did at Target. And, I could've also included Gluten-Free Cake mix in the shopping cart! Vitacost has it all, with only $5 shipping.

I'll be trying more and products along the way and share any fabulous finds with you.  Next on my journey are shaving gels, aluminum-free deodorant, hair conditioners, and bath effervescent gimmicks.

Disclaimer: Everybody body is uniquely different and will have different results.  Try at your own risk. I'm not trying to convince anyone to drop all their current products or insinuate that they are bad for you.  Obviously, most persons do not have severe or even mild reactions to regular beauty items. That's great. This is a little review for people who like natural/organic products, people who think average products are lacking, that some reactions might be delayed onset of continuous chemical use, and/or do not know what else might improve their situation without risking too much money or health. You may love or hate these products if you get curious.

All I'm saying is if I could, I'd make a heap of gift baskets with one each of these products, and give one to every special reader who subscribed to my blog.

Happy Slathering!

I Saw Red#40!

It's becoming a once weekly habit (habit that must be curbed) to talk myself into trouble. Thanks to insistent suggestions on prime time's syndicated television, I've had a violent hankering for strawberry flavored ice cream. It's a mystery how sugar depravity can make me slicker and enhance my self-justification skills toward any illicit actions. I can talk myself into feeling good about almost anything detrimental.

My diet must remain very low in sugar.  Confectionery items are allowed but sparingly within a month's time.  The most important part, to ensure my immune system is working at it's maximum, it must be limited to organic and natural treats.  At this point I have no excuse in my life to be eating anything with preservatives or high corn fructose syrup (Except that the nearest Whole Foods is a million miles away. That's how far it feels when my body is complaining). Did you see how I just justified having any ol' adultered cookie in my life again?

A few weeks ago, I read the McDonald's ice cream portion of their Sundae nutrition facts online.  Although much less than 15 dubious ingredients, I knew the sugar content was high and that corn syrups make your digestive system work too hard.  This is not just because I'm more sensitive to foods; it goes the same for every person.   Additionally , dairy is another food group that I must tip-toe around carefully. Only minimally processed dairy, if at all, or here come the hives and tummy discomfort.  Mind you, I'm not lactose intolerant, but any foreign chemical in my body will tell my autoimmune system there's a new playground to explore, so it best be pure.

I drive up to the window in shame, as I don't belong there for any excuse in the book. At the talking, static-y menu, I order a strawberry sundae.  Pulling up to the pay window, it occurs to me I could be making a monstrous mistake.  I never checked the toppings list!  I ask the awkward-acne-freckle faced adolescent boy,

"Would you be able to find out if the strawberry sauce contains food color & dye #40?"

With a non-confident shrug he tells me, "Uhhhmm, I dunno. Uhmmm I don't think so. Uh, I mean, it's just strawberries."

"Just strawberries?  JUST STRAWBERRIES???", I clamored to the high heavens!  Well, what I really said was, "Do you mind checking to see if you can find out for sure?"

This coming-of-age teenager works at McDonald's and yet he so innocently thinks what you see is what you get? He probably thinks those Big Macs are made from happy healthy cows skipping alongside fully-feathered flying chickens in a wide open field where the sky is always blue and it never rains!  Bless his heart again. I suppose it wasn't my job to fill him in that there's probably baby chick beak in his golden crispy nuggets.  What was I doing there?

Moving on up to the pick-up window, unbeknownst to the server, she hands me a sundae with the nuclear red fruit goop generously drizzled over my white sugary ice cream. Re-submitting my inquiry, she kindly checked with the scrambling servers in the back (it seems nobody in the Riverview McDonald's has ever asked to know the nutritional ingredients, unless they're smarter than I am and just stay away from such a place).

"Yes! It does!",  someone hollered in the background between the french fry heat lamps and corn syrup dispenser.

I cussed up a storm with my inside voice, "Is it okay to change it for a caramel one? I'm not able to have Red #40."

With a smile she politely obliged.  I paid and I was off.  I ate half of my sundae, justifying that half the damage is better than all of it.  I don't even want to know what's in the caramel surprise.

[caption id="" align="aligncenter" width="249" caption="Check your favorite McD's Snack Ingredient Fact. Double dog dare you."][/caption]

That switch spared me from being knocked down for 3-7 days with a migraine that comes complete with fireworks displays. It's a 15 minute reaction time to any red artificial ingredient, but more so lasting with the FDA approved food dye and coloring.  Go figure.  Even the unsuspecting Sobe LifeWater will also give my vision and perceptive senses an ecstasy-like "wah-wah", only with accompanying excruciating brain pain.

This account is not to say there wasn't any more lesson-learning to be had. The difference between the cheap sundae  and the Natural Breyer's Ice Cream I should've splurged $3 more on (in my defense, I was extremely weak from the work week and wouldn't last a trip to the store)(more justifications), was still a strong acid response to an already out-of-balance body.  The next two hours I was tossed into bed with weird numbness in my legs and prickling in my shoulders before I could move smoothly again.

The moral of this story, don't toy with a delicate balance, no matter how much sweetness one need in one's life.  (Justification No. #I Lost Count: Husband has been out of town for abour 5 days now, the longest he's every been, and my health logic is wearing thin because I miss his perky butt).

Let me sweetly reiterate that I do not condemn anyone else who does not memorize all the ingredients in restaurants and fast food joints. This is my lifestyle and its wonderful to those who do not live with such restrictions.  My sharing this episode to show what a fragile environment we live in, so that more and more people are becoming intolerant to unnatural ingredients, and that it should not come as a surprise to anyone, anymore, that what we unwittingly stuff into our mouths could be the reason why we're so tired, achy, and sick.  If your lovely child is bouncing off the walls, get the food diary when you give him/her M&Ms.  No exaggeration: I'm one step away of recording my man-child's reactions.

It's second nature to me, usually, to be hyper aware of every single food I consume.  I will not preach to you about hydrogenated oil if we go out to eat together, but I will send our waiter to the chef once or twice to verify that I don't get any meals that will flare up my knees and elbows.  I will not always react strongly to foods, but for the most part I must be vigilant about what and how much I eat.  Also, I can take a joke or two about it, cause in the end its so hilariously surreal.

Some people are blessed with metabolizing chemical compounds like it's nobody's business.  I'm still waiting for Husband to break in half or for his liver to fall out of his butt. Doctors really are baffled at how he hasn't reacted to years of accumulating compounds.  Makes me so sick I could shove a few Cinnabons down his throat just to get some relative empathy after I eat a Ritz cracker.  Luckily, he still shies away from enriched breads and greasy foods and may be his saving grace.

Well, yesterday night was rough and somewhere in the cluttered back of my head, I knew I would pay for it.  The battle to resist yummy foods continues...

...but if you ever see me reach for a pink cupcake without reading the label first, you're free to smush it in my face.

A Wedding Picture Fantasy - The Procrastinated Version

One year and a month after the wedding. We've come full circle and I suppose now we're just going to keep going in circles until we live happily ever after. It's been a crazy year with limited time, energy, resources, and alcohol; and I just finally got around to putting together our wedding album. Isn't that the first project a new bride undertakes as soon as she unpacks from the honeymoon? Screw the thank you notes!  There is still a fading aura of wedding festivity that lingers and can be stretched out for a few more days. Or months.

If you've been keeping up, you know last year was rough. At first, I thought I was just a lazy unsuccessful home maker when it was taking such agonizing effort to get the laundry and the dishes done by the time my husband got into town.  He would be gone two or three days for business and I was living in neat, questionable piles until the last minute he came home, only for him to find me passed out on the middle of our bare floor with rogue socks about.  Last minute pressure was my greatest motivator. Little did I know that my joints were stiffening up and wheat products were piling up toxins in my lymph nodes so that I was becoming as dumb as a board.  I would simply make lists of everything I had wanted to achieve and would stare at it every once in a while.  Never has a person wanted to do tedious chores.

Now that I  refrain from specific food allergens and don't feel feel drunk every day, my first project was the wedding picture album. Our family home is devoid of history and we must build on the little bit we have accumulating;  except for a few masterpieces I hung on the staircase hall.   I was probably on a salad kick (with Adderall croutons) that day, so no brain fuzzies.  Probably also a full moon.

I've printed the riveting pictures taken as our wedding gift by Husband's long time friends;  now mine too. Their current website is on the blogroll of if you click here. The one where our wedding was featured is here.  See if you can find us! They are both a must see and worth considering if you live in Florida or can't find your good side.

You would think, living next door, a literal beer run away from Target Superstore, I would've easily taken care of this even throughout the early fog days I experienced.  You would think.  I have no excuse for that one.  Somewhere between too much headwork on which pictures to enlarge and money that I could use buying cats, it got put off.  But last week when I had a tiny window of energy, I marched right over and picked me up this eye-pleasing album:



I had almost ordered it online to save my swollen hips a bit of strain, but the walk came in handy, and it was $8 less at the store than on the website. Score! There are many more frilly, ostentatious  albums more reminiscent of a wedding event. There were some tasteful flowery ones, some with artistic cursive  'Love' lettering thrown up all over the cover,  and one that caught my eye with a slim white gown and a pink flower dotted on.  But I considered Husband in this decision and if it were pink, he would be more hesitant to leaf through it.  If it were full or roses, he would say, "It's nice" without even knowing what he was saying "It's nice" about.  So I went for the monochrome, elegant, fabric-covered, simple album that is very similar to our style, together.

Now, the disconcerting part to me about this little tale is that I eagerly tore into the pictures, ripped off the plastic cover like cat on catnip (a lot of cat references), and waited dramatically for that wedding excitement to sucker-punch me across the face all over again.  Nothing. I started inserting the 200 4x6s one by one. Halfway through I was bored. I tucked the remaining ones in the box and slid it into a corner to finish later. Where were all the lovey-dovey fluttery feelings? Was I supposed to slip on my wedding dress before I started this project for the clouds to part and radiant sun beams to shower down upon me and my wedding album? Eventually I got around to it, of course, while on the phone and multi-tasking without any solemnity put into the task.  But I must say, it does feel more complete to have the beginning our of little adventure ready for display or memory lane trips. The cat agrees.

[caption id="" align="alignnone" width="500" caption="Dang Cat claiming territory"][/caption]

And here's one of my favorites. This one if for you housewives trying to get domesticated:

[caption id="" align="aligncenter" width="480" caption="Courtesy of Pietri Photography"][/caption]